Paula Schild, PhD, Psychotherapist, Boulder, CO: Marriage Counseling, Stepparent Therapy, Women'd Depression Therapy Relationship Problems Therapy, Couples Counseling, Blended Families Assistance, Boulder, CO
Relationship Counseling by Dr. Paula Schild, Boulder, CO Paula R. Schild, PhD, Boulder, CO Psychotherapist

Frequently Asked Questions

1) How do you work with individuals?

It depends on what you come in for help with. If you’re unsatisfied with your current romantic, friend/family or work relationships, I typically use the Adult Attachment Interview, (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJTGbVc7EJY to understand the relationship models you developed early in life which affect every relationship in a non-conscious way. Then I can help you learn how your early relationship models interact with other people in less than optimal ways. Many times, this new awareness is enough to change these interaction patterns.

If not, we will explore whether you could benefit from EMDR or Brainspotting techniques, to help process and release those interactional patterns that are no longer useful.

2) What approach do you use working with couples?

I am trained in a variety of techniques to help couples feel closer and manage conflict more effectively. Initially, I look at communication patterns to determine how well couples actually hear each other. Then I give some simple communication exercises like John Gottman’s (www.gottman.com) for a couple to practice in session with me and at home.

If couples have difficulty completing the exercises and/or find themselves continuing in repetitive fights, I often do a brief relationship history based on the Adult Attachment Interview (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJTGbVc7EJY). This helps both the couple and myself to understand relationship models that were developed early in life, which are brought in to every relationship in a non-conscious way to help the couple see how their relationship models interact in less than optimal ways. Many times, this new awareness is enough to change these interaction patterns.

If not, we will explore whether you could benefit from EMDR or Brainspotting techniques, to help process and release those interactional patterns that are no longer useful.

3) How do you help someone struggling with depression?

The first thing I do is assess whether or not someone has the symptoms of depression, using standard criteria found in the DSM-V (http://www.dsm5.org/Pages/Default.aspx). After discussing when or how the depression began, I may recommend that you see a psychiatrist for a possible medication evaluation.

A great deal of depression comes from situational factors such as the loss of a job or loved one. If so, I will work with you to come up with ways to manage your depressive symptoms and use non-medication techniques, such as mindfulness, meditation, or physical activities.

However, if you do have a chemical imbalance (as determined by a psychiatrist), medication and therapy has been found to be the most effective treatment.

4) What should 1/we come to you for help with our step/blended-family?

I am a stepmother trained to work specifically with step-families by The National Resource Council on Stepfamilies (www.stepfamilies.info). I know the challenges that stepfamily life presents, which is very different from first families. For example sometimes there’s no “honeymoon” period for the couple and they find it hard to learn to love each other’s kids.

I am trained to help you with the following issues:

  • Stepfamily myths;
  • Realistic expectations for adults and children;
  • Stages of stepfamily development;
  • Finances;
  • Defining roles and rules;
  • Developing empathy;

5) What qualifies you to work with military veterans and their families?

I feel very strongly about helping those who have risked their lives serving our country and trained in combat stress and military and work with Team Rubicon (www.teamrubiconusa.org)


 

Paula R. Schild, PhD.1910 7th Street, Boulder, CO 80302,    Tel. 303.908.6557